Rum, Running and the Aunt Di Organ Recital Rule

“I never really discussed this with anyone because it sounds pretentious, but I started running….to become a better person. I thought if you could run one hundred miles, you’d be in this Zen state. You’d be the fu*$#%& Buddha, bringing peace and a smile to the world. It didn’t work in my case—I’m the same old punk-ass as before—but there’s always the hope that it will turn you into the person you want to be, a better, more peaceful person.” Jenn Shelton, Born to Run 

Running just might turn me into a better and more peaceful person. I can hope, but like Jenn, I’m currently the same old punk-ass that I’ve always been. That said, I’m only 3 ½ weeks into my 18-week training plan, so maybe by the marathon I’ll lose the punk and just be an ass? I am raising money for a great cause, so that should help.

I wasn’t sure my old carcass could handle a 26-mile run when I chose to sign up for the Marine Corps Marathon, and I don’t think I’ll know until race day.  I am dealing with a few chronic aches and pains, and I’ll discuss them briefly in each training post, but I want to keep my whining to a minimum (I can actually hear my wife’s thoughts as she reads this: “That will be a refreshing change.”).

To minimize my whining, I plan to adhere to Aunt Di’s Organ Recital Rule (ORR). Aunt Di is of course, my wife’s aunt, Diane Hunter (pictured above). We should all hope to age as gracefully as Aunt Di. At age 87, she sails her boat to the Bahamas every fall and lives on it during the winter season! What might be even more impressive is that the woman has a drink named after her. If you find yourself in certain bars in Boston, or in Hopetown, Bahamas, you can order a Di Hunter: Mt. Gay Rum and Tonic with a splash of Malibu Rum for that Caribbean taste.  As for the quantity of rum, that’s for you to decide. But if you’re in your 80s like Aunt Di, make it a strong pour. Does it really matter at that point?

As you can imagine, Aunt Di is not the type of person to whine about aging, and she grew tired of going to parties and listening to endless stories about her friends’ new knees, hips and other assorted body parts, so she introduced the ORR.  The ORR mandates that everyone has 5 minutes to talk about their physical issues at the start of a party and that’s it. I’m going to follow the spirit of the ORR law and limit myself to one paragraph per post on my physical issues. Of course, this entire blog is based on my AMD diagnosis, so technically, I’ve already violated this rule.

Metrics

• 65.2 miles: Distance I’ve run in first 3 weeks of training
• 2 Chiropractic adjustments
• 2 Massages: I kind of feel like I’m cheating since I’m seeing 2 different massage therapists, but neither one knows I’m seeing the other. Then again, they see other people so these are mutually open relationships 

Training Updates

Injury Status: The FAKE NEWS running media has been quoting anonymous sources who say I’m old and my hammies and back will give out. Sad! Though I’ve had some minor hamstring pain, it’s been manageable. What I’m worried most about is my back. My spine is like the San Andreas fault line in California. It’s always shifting and I never know when a major quake is going to strike. So far, my chiropractor has managed the minor tremors, but I’m going to have to monitor this closely.

Young Sean vs. OMT (Ol’ Man Teare) Update: In case you missed my first post (link), I’m trying to beat Young Sean’s time of 4:30 in the Boston Marathon 18 years ago. It’s only been 3 weeks, but if my body holds up, I think I can not only beat my time, but break the 4:00 barrier. So far, the betting public seems to be favoring OMT with most bets falling in the 4:00-4:10 or 4:20 – 4:30 range. Place your bet today!

I ran a 5K race in my hometown on the 4^th of July with my 15 -year old son and 39-year-old sister-in-law (he’s really 15, but she’s not really 39). I ran at a scorching (for me) pace of 7:30. I’m still amazed I could run at that pace and not blow out my hamstrings. I kept thinking I would need to throttle it back, but I felt strong and decided to push it. Does this mean I can add a minute to that pace and hold it for 26 miles? I have no idea, but I’m excited that I could even sustain a sub-8:00 pace for 3 miles. I’m planning on running a half-marathon in mid-August, so I think that will be a much better indicator of my marathon pace.

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